Entry 02

This has been the most excruciating change I’ve made to date.

Not feeling ready but leaping anyway. Not feeling ready but starting regardless.

Some of us have a blessing that is balanced with a curse. We accept our divine role as creator, yet cling to structure, order and have a craving for perfection which are not character flaws, but these traits can become a curse if they take precedence over action.

When writing, I sit and ponder, then will act and often delete the words which have the ability to transform and awaken the reader. The written words never seem perfect enough and can always be improved. This is a truth; you can always iterate and do a better job at whatever creation you’re working on.

However, when is enough …. enough?

Enough overthinking, enough deletion, enough procrastination.

Years pass and the ideas in your head remain a prisoner when striving for perfection because you don’t have faith in the process and courage to leap into the unknown. When this becomes lifestyle a dissatisfaction with oneself can spiral into deep sadness that can morph into depression.

I’ve spent time there. Stuck. Sad. Sickened I was wasting my life.

Creative ideas are never the problem, it’s releasing them regardless of perfection, feeling ready and having unshakable trust in your own, personal brand of magic.

To get out of deep sadness, it took simple action, a leap into the unknown. I wrote down three things I wanted to change and a list of three rituals I would do each day to move in the direction of living again.

Rituals, habits, routine. Just three things a day.

It doesn’t require being deeply sad to incorporate the power of ritual into your life to effect change. It does take a deep desire and discipline for a period of time, and when I took the leap to climb out of the dark hole, I did not feel ready.

Today, that period of time is only a memory, but here’s the clincher …. the necessity to leap regardless of whether you feel ready never goes away with each new transformation. uplevel or project we yearn to create.

If you are a writer, a poet, a fry-cook or a street sweeper, there’s an energy, a life force that can only be expressed through you and if you stop this creative magic from channeling through to the world, you’ve not lived a fraction of your potential.

Your obligation is to keep the channel pure, open and leap. You can learn more here